Rachael agreed to an interview under terms to withhold the family name in order to “spare my family from shame.” A couple of years ago, she didn’t expect her life to take a sudden downwards spiral into chaos. She had no clue as to what to do with her life or where to turn. She had no one by her side except for her boyfriend and their newborn baby boy, Tyrome. Rachael was seventeen the year she gave birth to Tyrome.
Hard choices
Rachael was unable to tend to her school work and watch Tyrome at the same time. So she dropped out of high school. Her boyfriend was holding a steady job and was also unable to watch their baby boy so she made the decision to quit school for the sake of their son.
Many girls opt to quit school after they give birth. “I saw my quitting as the most sensible choice at the time,” Rachael said. “It was a hard decision but it had to be done.”
While quitting school after having a baby is not encouraged, it is very hard to avoid. Some women live well-to-do lives and could afford a babysitter or have family willing to help out. In Rachael’s case, her family practically disowned her for getting “knocked up” at such an early age and her boyfriend’s salary could hardly pay for the diapers, food, medical care, and housing utilities all in one month. “A babysitter was out of the question,” Rachael said.
When her child turned two months old, Rachael admitted to missing her friends and going out. “My friends would visit me and ask how the baby was. Some even offered to babysit but after seeking permission, their parents would not let them. Their parents saw me as a bad influence,” Rachael added.
“My friends would still come to visit and spend a few hours with me,” She said. But through all the negativity she received from their parents, the hardest to swallow were from her own parents who told her to find a job and a place to stay the day she told them she was pregnant.
She had no choice but to move into her boyfriend’s house but still lived with his parents. Rachael received a warm greeting but as her child grew to ten months, she knew it was time to find a place of their own.
Her boyfriend hunted for a fair-priced apartment and found one in Susupe. Rachael and her small family struggled for a month until she found out about the Women’s, Infants, and Children program. (WIC provides federal grants to states and territories for supplemental foods, health care referrals, and nutrition education for low-income pregnant, breastfeeding, and non-breastfeeding postpartum women, and to infants and children up to age five who are found to be at nutritional risk.)
“The WIC program immensely lifted the worry, if only temporarily, of providing food to my baby,” Rachael said.
After recounting her struggles in the first year of giving birth, Rachael would like to advise other girls to wait if you plan to have a baby or have sex. “If you are going to have sex, please use protection against an unwanted pregnancy. I do not regret having Tyrome but I didn’t expect to get pregnant and life is much harder for me now,” she said.
Rachael’s life has improved over time but she makes a point that it’s not going to be easy being young and having a child to look after while creating a better life for your child.
Two months ago, Rachael married the father of her child through the court and anticipates the struggles, tears, and pain that await her but is also looking forward to the laughter, smiles, and joy that come from simply having a close knit family.
“In two days, I’m off to Guam. To set up a new life for my small family. Sure, we’ll have a struggle bigger than anyone I know but we’ll get somewhere. I’ll continue school soon and life will get better for the three of us.”
